PPD, not severe enough to call Tom Cruise for help.

Everything is going well :)  Brandon had his follow-up at his pediatrician yesterday, and got a clean bill of health!  He still has a bit of jaundice, but doc said it will go away with the breastfeeding and putting him in the light via window.  His lungs are clear (what we both were hoping to hear), and he's back up to his birthweight (excellent news...mommy's milk is definitely working it's wonders).  He's such a calm little man...he has some confusion over days/nights, but doesn't cry at night, just doesn't want to go to sleep, either...lol.  We're working on it, tho...I've been trying to keep him awake (quite a task in itself) a little more during the evening. 

I had thought I might have escaped the PPD blues, but it looks like I was wrong.  It's certainly not bad...nothing at all to do with the baby, or Kaitlynne...it's Alex.  I guess because the last week was sooooo overwhelming (physically and emotionally), it's been hard to find the time to exhale.  Having Alex here with me made it all ok...he held my hand, kissed me, cried with me, told me everything would be ok...and it is.  So, it's been very hard when he leaves for work now.  Hard on him because he wants to spend time with Brandon, hard on me because I want him to have that, as well as just be here with me.  I cry when he leaves, tho I really try hard not to, because I don't want to make it harder on him than it is...but I just can't stop myself. 

I love you, Alex.  You're my best friend, without a doubt.  You're the loving father to my daughter when her own disappeared, and you've given me 2 beautiful children.   Thank you...for everything.